Never Up! Never In!

… was one of my mother’s favorite sayings.
She was a golfer with several trophies attributing to her mettle. Her game was won on the green. Coming down the fairway, her goal was to get as close to the green in as few shots possible, then chip close to the pin, and putt the ball in the hole with one stroke. “Never up. Never in,” she’d say.
Today, while driving, I was behind a car that slowed down when approaching an intersection with a green traffic light and was reminded of my mother. I often observe drivers who slow down when approaching a traffic light that is green and even put their foot on the brake. Then I remember my mother’s words, “Never up; never in.” I wonder if they approach their goals the same way and put their foot on the brake when something they have long desired shows up.
What causes us humans to “hit the brakes” when the “coast is clear?” What is this fear that seems to permeate our very existence, as if it is part of our genetic make-up down through the centuries? How can we turn that fear that holds us back into confidence?
Fear, that fight or flight reflex, often helped our ancestors stay alive. Today, it limits our range. Am I afraid of success or afraid of failure? It’s not always easy to know the answers. What is important is to ask the question.

I do know this: my mother was always supportive, no matter whether I was a success or a failure in the moment. Now I remember that and tell myself to be nonjudgmental of where I am on my path.


Quote of the Week

Gavin de Becker, in The Gift of Fear, states that “True fear is a survival signal that sounds only in the presence of danger; yet unwarranted, fear has assumed a power over us that it holds over no other creature on earth.”
Read more about turning fear into confidence at Holly Doherty’s site: